Cherishing Illusions: A Beer and a Horizon in Lausanne

I sat with a beer in my hand and wondered, what now. I’m in Lausanne and it’s exquisite, never seen anything like this really, yes there was Lake Como but I would say that these places are beyond simple comparisons, it is like comparing two mesmerising sunsets and trying to decide which one was ‘more’ magical, there is no ‘more’ here, it’s all made of the same magic dust that keeps one in awe.

I don’t drink, nor do I smoke, well, occasionally on a social basis to fit in, nobody likes a person who doesn’t do either, it’s a sin to deem yourself as ‘healthy’ in a world that is on the edge of sanity physically and mentally. But today, it was only me.

“Have a beer boy”, my mind told me. 

“What makes me alive?”, my mind asks me as if It knew the answer. Somewhere, maybe it did. Somewhere my mind wanted to answer this question by seeking validation from itself. 

W.S. Merwin had once said, “We are asleep with compasses in our hands.” 

I understand him, you see, we want to go, go where? You might ask, nowhere, just go somewhere.  

We have a compass in our hands that points towards our most earnest desires, it points in the direction of our hearts, these desires are constantly reverberating within every fibre of our being, while we sleep, bathe and slop around in that horrendous cubicle, these desires force the compass that we hold within our chests, to point towards our calling. 

The insane hear it in the form of heartbeats.

I watched each wave, splashing itself against the rocks, silently once and then violently again, changing its form as if it had the right to be something at this moment and something entirely different in the next, 

Ah, how I wish I was like those waves. How I wish I was allowed to change who I am momentously.

The world values corpses, it values the inhalation and exhalation of zombies who refuse to flow like the changing tidal waves, stagnation being the very enemy that is encapsulating this society and proliferating it deeply in the form of ‘balance’, ‘rational’, ‘logical’ and what not.

My friend, I could see the horizon, I have seen many horizons, and every time I wonder if the next horizon I see would make me stop wondering how transcendental horizons are, I prove myself incorrect. 

The insanity of this wonder keeps my eyes unblinking, my breathing scathily slowed down, and a silence dawned upon me whilst I saw a thin, imaginary line, I saw a grandeur of an illusion that separated the mighty lake from the endless sky, 

I will cherish this illusion, no matter how big a lie these pupils deem it to be, I will cherish it. No matter what science tells me, I will cherish it. Let the world believe it's a lie, I will make it as real as real can be.